Healing from a breakup is a deeply personal journey. Thereâs no âone-size-fits-allâ timeline, and that is perfectly okay.
In this article, I want to share some simple but powerful steps that helped me personally, both through my heartbreaks and professional experience.
These steps are gentle. They can be done at your own pace. And most importantly, they are designed to help you reconnect with yourself and begin your healing journey.
1. Be Patient With Yourself
Healing after a breakup isnât linear. Some days you will feel like you have moved forward, only to feel sadness wash over you again suddenly. That doesnât mean you are failing; it means you are human. Allow yourself space to feel without judgment.
Emotions like denial, sadness, resentment, or grief arenât âbadâ; they are part of the process.
2. Feel Your Feelings (Even the Uncomfortable Ones)
One of the most healing things you can do after a breakup is to feel whatâs really there. Donât suppress it. Donât push it away. Sit in silence, breathe deeply, and ask yourself where you feel that pain in your body. Often, it sits heavy in the heart.
Itâs okay to cry. Tears are cleansing, they are a release, not a weakness. As I often say "tears are the river of life".
3. Journal to Release the Noise in Your Head
Feeling your feelings is step one. But staying constantly in them? That is when things can spiral. Try writing everything down, with no filters. Whether itâs anger, longing, confusion, or even moments of relief, LET IT ALL OUT. This process helps clear mental and emotional clutter and makes room for clarity and peace.
4. Cut Contact to Create Space
Yes, itâs hard. And no, itâs not about hating your ex. Itâs about protecting your peace. Limit or end communication, specially in the early stages, staying connected keeps old wounds open, and it does not let any of you heal. If you share responsibilities like children or a house, stick to only those topics. Keep it respectful, but focused.
5. Find Closure
Oftentimes, we seek closure. Maybe you didnât get any, or perhaps you did, but you still find yourself replaying thoughts, feelings, and words you wish you could have expressed. In these moments, try writing a letter to your ex (but donât send it). This letter is just for you. Say everything you need to say, openly and honestly. Then, when you are ready, let it go, tear it up and throw it away.
This is a powerful practice for closure, even when you never got the chance to have that conversation face-to-face.
6. Focus on the Truth, Not Just the Good Memories
Your mind might replay the best parts of the relationship, and that is natural. But remember: it ended for a reason. Create a list of reasons the relationship didnât work out, without bitterness, just honesty. When nostalgia comes back to your mind, revisit this list to stay grounded.
7. Start Focusing on YOU Again
Breakups can make us feel like we have lost ourselves. But the beautiful part is, you now have the space to rediscover who you are, outside of that relationship.
What hobbies do you have or have had before? What makes you feel calm, joyful, or alive? Whether itâs going for a solo walk, trying a new class, a sport or just taking yourself out for coffee, start showing up for YOU again.
Even small self-care acts matter. You donât have to do something big, just something kind for yourself, consistently.
A Little Extra Support (Because You Deserve It)
If any part of this resonated with you, I created something special that might help. âA Guide To Healing From đA Breakupâ is a gentle, 32-page ebook I wrote from the heart. Itâs filled with emotional insights, healing tools, and mindset shifts that supported me through my heartbreaks, and it includes 6 exclusive guided meditations to help you stay grounded through every stage of healing.
Inside, you will learn how to:
đŻď¸ Cope with denial, sadness, and loneliness
âď¸ Let go, cut contact, and find closure
â ď¸ Avoid unhealthy coping habits
đ Practice forgiveness and rebuild self-love
đ§ Begin feeling like yourself again
The guided meditations (which I personally recorded) are beginner-friendly and align with each chapterâs theme, so you can heal emotionally and spiritually, even if you have never meditated before.
đ Click here to learn more and get your copy of the ebook + meditations
You Are Not Alone
Breakups can feel isolating, but please remember: you are not alone. So many of us have been there, and we eventually heal, slowly, softly and deeply. Donât rush your process. Donât judge your emotions. Just keep showing up for yourself with love.
If this article helped, consider watching the full video on my channel for more in-depth support and guidance. And if you feel ready to take your healing further, my ebook is here for you, whenever you need it.
Wishing you love, light, and healing,
EstefanĂa
